So I have just realized that it has been a super long time since I posted anything here.  I am back down in San Diego, living in an apartment with some friends and my soon-to-be new husband.  Yep, I am engaged.

Marriage plans are set for November this year and I have contradicting emotions.  On the one hand, I am very much in love with him.  He has become my best friend.  He is honest, open, sweet, makes me laugh all the time, and is very patient with me.  He is my other half.  However, on the other hand, I am terrifed.  I do not want this relationship to turn out like my last marriage.  I dont want to point fingers on that account since there were things we both could have done differently.   My current love and relationship are nothing like the last one, but I still very afraid of doing something stupid to ruin it all.  Mostly, I am very excited.  I am sure that if I take a step back from time to time, i can keep myself from doing anything drastically dumb.

I have a new job now. (Previous job post is a whole other story set for another time.) So I am working as a front desk person at a chiropractic office.  I have been there over a month and I still love the job.  The doctors are so nice and very easy to get along with.  There is another lady who works in the morning and my only issue with her is that I don’t get to see her a lot.  She is awesome and I hope I don’t bug her too much with some of my silly questions.  What I love about the office is that it is so relaxing because it is super organized.  I love that I can find everything.  I love the way the office is set up.  I hope I can stay here for a long while yet.
I also am starting back at school.  I am enrolled in 4 classes (13 units) and working toward finishing my AA degrees.  I am so close so my fiance encouraged me to go back and just finish it and then I can go to the school I really want.  I have decided that I want to get my certificate in HHP (holistic health practitioner).  I think it will be imensly helpful for my own health and I can work to help others as well.

On my health note, I am steadily improving.  I was diagnosed with Addison’s last year.  The doctor said at the rate my body was shutting down, I wouldn’t last very long.  I was on some heavy drugs and receiving blood transfusions every few weeks.  Not fun, I might add.  Then I was approved for an experimental drug and that became my saving grace.  My body is catching up.  It have been 2 months since my last transfusion.  I am not feeling too good right now and there have been a few close hospital trips, but I am considerably better than at Christmastime.
Well, today I am off to the office for an adjustment, then I am going to the beach since I haven’t been all summer.  Tonight our little apartment family is having FHE and hopefully we can go swimming. YAY!

I will do my best to post more often but I make no promises!

I need a fresh start, a new beginning.  I don’t like my current situation, and the more I try, the more nothing better is happening.  I want to move away, far away.  Just cut ties, and start over.  If I could go anywhere, it would be Ireland.  But, seeing as I have no money, and soon, no place to live, I don’t see this as a plausible thing. so, Orange county seems to be as far as I am getting right now.

I no longer work for the music studio.  I now work for a marketing company.  At first, it was great, but now, I feel like a huge hypocrite.  I hate it when people try to solicit me, and now, that is exactly what I am doing.  Not happy.

Also, my holidays will not be merry and bright, seeing as the people I want to spend time with then are all leaving to go be with family elsewhere, I will be spending them all alone.

Yep.  Good times.

Man I need to get out of here.

So, an update on my ever continuous life.  List format for now.  Maybe some ellaboration later…

In a fraternity

Got a rockin job at a music studio

crashed my computer

getting no sleep

paid off the new laptop

co-founded a vocal group

started a new semester in college

got divorced

still on the speech team

still getting no sleep

still poor

teaching piano

helping put together a Christmas program

more of the no sleeping thing

turned 21

got my first ticket

Yup, life is good. everything is all right for now and I hope it sticks for a while.

Here is your new post. Woo.

Okay….breathe….good, Nella……just breathe…..and type really fast so you can get this over with involving as little amount of pain possible…….*exhale*……here goes:

Okay, I have a myspace and a facebook page but it is TOTALLY not my fault! It is these creatures I call my friends! They tied me up and promised copious amounts of chocolate if I just did what they said so I did!  So there I was, forced into joining the occult of myspace and facebook.  Now, granted, I enjoy facebook a little more than myspace which is why I spend more time on Facebook.  Because of this time spent in utter mindlessness, I noticed that many people on Facebook are obsessed with this thing called “Twilight”.  I have heard of it because the movie trailer looked interesting to me when I stumbled upon it a few weeks ago.  So, I decided to read the book.

And I got hooked.

The series story is about a vampire (Edward) and a human (Bella) who fall in love.  However, this love is dangerous because of the nature of Vampires, you know, eating people and all that.  His nature constantly puts her in harms way and he is constantly having to save her.  On top of that, Bella’s best friend is a Werewolf, who are not on good terms with the Vampires. It is very well written, the characters are great, I love the dialogue, and I WANT AN EDWARD CULLEN!

See, books like this give us terrible expectations for the people in our lives.  I want a guy just like Edward.  I want him to a gentleman, witty, with that hint of danger. 

Twilight is the greatest!!! Read the books! Join the war! Vampire vs. Werewolf.  Pick a side!  (I personally am going for Edward.)

….*whew*…….there, that wasn’t so bad………

The lyrics of this song really hit me today as I was thinking about someone.  I thought I would post the words here.  Almost Lover by A Fine Frenzy:

 

Your fingertips across my skin,

The palmtrees swaying in the wind,

Images.

You sang me Spanish lullabies,

The sweetest sadness in your eyes,

Clever trick.

 

I never want to see you unhappy,

I thought you’d want the same for me.

 

Goodbye my almost lover,

Goodbye my hopeless dream.

I’m trying not to think about you,

Can’t you just let me be?

So long my luckless romance,

My back is turned on you.

Should have known you’d bring me heartache.

Almost lovers always do.

 

We walked along a crowded street,

You took my hand and danced with me,

Images.

And when you left you kissed my lips,

You told me you’d never, never forget,

These images.

 

I’d never want to see you unhappy,

I thought you’d want the same for me.

 

Goodbye my almost lover,

Goodbye my hopeless dream,

I’m trying not to think about you,

Can’t you just let me be?

So long my luckless romance,

My back is turned on you.

Should have known you’d bring me heartache.

Almost lovers always do.

 

I cannot go to the ocean,

I cannot drive the streets at night,

I cannot wake up in the morning,

Without you on my mind.

So you’re gone and I’m haunted,

And I bet you are just fine.

Did I make it that easy to walk right in and out,

Of my life?

 

Goodbye my almost lover,

Goodbye my hopeless dream,

I’m trying not to think about you.

Cant you just let me be?

So long my luckless romance,

My back is turned on you.

Should have known you’d bring me heartache.

Almost lovers always do.

 

To the man at the WaMu ATM who was picking his nose,

Yes, Sir, I did watch you.  I was in my car, trying to mind my own business.  I look up to see if the ATM was free, which it wasn’t, as you were there.  I watch for a moment to see if you will leave anytime soon.

Now, Sir, there are some things in life that you cannot “un-see”.  This would be one of those things.

I watched in Horror as you lifted the chubby pointer finger of your left hand up towards your face.  Eyes bugged and mouth wide open, I stared as it entered the dark crevasses of your nose and returned with the treasure it so desperately sought.  And then, gasping, I tried to turn away as you laid the Finger of Doom upon the ATM keys, but my eyes could not leave the crime scene!  Oh!  I cannot imagine the trauma the individuals who use the ATM after must go through, seeing a shiny piece of …No, I cannot say it here.  You may faint.

I am sure the humiliation you feel, now that I have told your story to the world is immense.  However, the people must be warned!  DO NOT USE THE ATM AT WAMU ON MELROSE!!!  It has been infected with FMB*!!!

Feel the shame, Sir, knowing that you have been caught in the acting of poisoning the world with your disease!  May you find the caverns of your nose to be dried and treasure-less!  And may the one-toothed snail that lives in those caverns awake and bite your fingers off the next time you shove them up there!

Yours truly,

The Charming Lady in the Little Grey Car.

 

*FMB – Fat Man Boogers.  Nasty!

enough said.  feel free to comment on any and all of the writings in this blog.  and read the post on the rolling backpack (“rollin rollin rollin”).  funny funny.

Aaauuuggggghhhhhhhhhh!!!! This makes me so mad!  The reason we schedule lessons is so the student will show up at that time to have lessons, so that the teacher has gas money to get to work for the next few days.  And when the student doesn’t show up for a few weeks?  Bad things happen.  Like the light in my car telling me that running on fumes is not going to cut it.  If my young grasshopper does not want to take lessons anymore, she needs to call or email or send message by carrier pigeon so I know!  Totally Boo-eth!!!!

I have noticed something at work today.  And that is how people will smile to your face and the minute you turn around, they stab you in the back.  Lucky for me, this didn’t happen to me, I was merely an observer.  And to the disappointment of me, I did nothing to fix it. 

A co-worker of mine recently quit after many months of working at this place of business.  She worked alongside the rest of us and I was under the impression that while, yes, she was not the best dresser for professional-ishattire, the other members of the staff liked her.  Recently, I was told that I was to be trained on the ever complicated-ness of the Carpet Cleaner O Doom.  Seriously, not that difficult, spray, scrub, vacuum.  Big whoop.  Well, this co-worker of mine threw a fit at having to do the carpet cleaning.  (In reality, I was the one who was going to do the actual work, she only needed to tell me how to do it…)  Anywho, big fit, manager and boss involved, big final scene, she leaves.  Then, I was surprised by the other members of the staff.  All at once, not minutes after she walks out the front door, they begin to bash her.  They call her negative and lazy and are glad she is gone because they never liked her in the first place and the store is much better off without her and on and on and on.  I was shocked.  I sat by and said nothing except that I was surprised that all this escalated over a simple matter of carpet cleaning.  (obviously there was more to it. this was merely the straw that broke the camels back…) 

It amazes me that people who pretend to like you will smile and thank you and act like they genuinely care about your existence and then the moment you are gone, they talk about you and spread gossip about you.  This is not right.  There is not much that a simple blogger like me can do about it, but if any of you who read this make a promise to yourself, as I did today, that you will end the mudslinging, maybe things will get better.  A pay-it-forward kinda thing.  Don’t escalate to rumors or fuel the gossip. 

And for those of you who are worried that other people are doing this behind your back, turn your back around.  Look them dead in the eye.  And smile.  Because nothing throws people off more than smiling back at your enemies.  Don’t listen to what they say.  Smile and walk away.  You don’t need people like that in your life.  It is better to be confident in yourself, by yourself, than to be lifted up by liars and deceivers.  Have enough confidence in yourself to say, in the long run, does it really matter what these little minds think of me?  No, in the long run, they will merely be the dust under your kingly shoes.  And turn your back, back around.